Proverbs 16:32

Considering the idea of God’s ways contrasted with our ways—my goodness how the truth touches every aspect of life!—I can’t help but apply it to the raising of my children.  The world we live in has its priorities, it’s ideals concerning parental responsibilities and goals. The world’s way of thinking is ridiculously easy to get caught up in.  For the sake of time, I won’t go into the world-view on this because if you have children, or remember being a child, then you know exactly what the pressures are out there in the world.  

But I ask, how does that compare with God’s plan and purpose for our children?  What does He have to say about our priorities and ideals?  What should be at the top of our lists when it comes to goals for raising our children?  Here is where I could list hundreds of verses that God has used to lay the foundation of how my husband and I train and disciple our children, but to prove that life is a continual journey of learning and that God always has more in store for us, I will focus on the verse that stood out to me in my reading for the very first time just now, and that verse is Proverbs 16:32:

“He that is slow to anger is better than the mighty; and he that ruleth his spirit than he that taketh a city.”

What is success?  We may all have different ideas about what makes a man or woman successful, but I am going to go out on a limb here and assume that we all would consider “mighty men” and “conquerors” successful, if not heroic.  Think of some of them, who are the mighty men, the conquerors, from history that we have long idealized?  Do we dream of raising children who may someday walk in the footsteps of those men and women, children who may someday be known as “mighty men”?  Do we want our children to be so successful in life that they would have the ability, the brains, the skill, the determination to rule a city?  There’s a good possibility that though we may not think about it consciously, we do dream of such things for our kids simply because we want them to be the BEST they can be.  But this verse reveals God’s thoughts on success.  It unwraps His ideals and priorities…He states, acknowledging our respect of human success and accomplishment, that a man who can control his temper is BETTER than the mighty and those who successfully rule over their spirits are BETTER than conquerors.  God says that success is clearly, dramatically, drastically, different than what we assume.

So how does that affect the raising of our kids?   

Some are probably shaking their heads or staring at the screen with one eyebrow raised because, of course, they are not grooming their children to become conquerors or even mighty men.  But surely we can all recognize that we are grooming them for something.  What is your dream for your child?  Is it that they grow up to be well off?  Then they’ll have to be prepared to secure a darn good gig.  Is it your dream for them to become successful businessmen, entrepreneurs, doctors, pastors?  What are you doing to accomplish those goals?   

Now here’s where it might hurt…where do those priorities fall in relationship to Godly character building?  How much time each day do you spend enriching your child’s mind (or even your own) with ‘educational’ materials, training them up to be good students, and how does that compare with the amount of time you invest in the difficult work of training them to be self-controlled?  When you wake in the morning are you thinking about your child’s struggles with math or English, or do you awaken with thoughts about your child’s struggles with SIN?  

I have to admit that even though I am a home-school mom and have made huge changes in our lifestyle to follow God’s leading in this area, I have sooooooo much to learn and change.  Each day I am learning to stop and renew my mind because I can see that the framework of this world is still shaping what I do, why I do it, and how.  It’s a constant battle, but again, I refuse to do things anyway but God’s.  I refuse to please or accommodate anyone’s will but God’s.  I refuse to settle for less.