Jehova Jireh

Jehova Jireh 

My Provider

I grew up in a home in which we prayed for everything.  We thanked God for our food, if we lost something mom would always say, “Pray for God to help you find it.” (and He always did!), if we wanted something we were taught to pray for it, so I always had the head knowledge of God as a “provider”.  

As I grew up, particularly as I grew up in faith, I began to acknowledge and understand that God wouldn’t give me anything that He wouldn’t equip me to handle, thus giving me a different view of His provision.  The most important of these lessons, of course, coming from the gifts of a husband and children :)
   
It wasn’t until very recently that God opened my eyes to really see the depth of what His role is as Provider.  Having read the New Testament front to back a number of times, of course I read the passages repeatedly that God used to make me really grasp His truth, but as usual, God has His own perfect timing for revealing things, and as usual, it doesn’t seem to be in the timing I most appreciate at the moment!  

Over the last two years I have experienced what I can only compare to a 1-2-3 knockout tactic from above!  Hitting me almost simultaneously with three very deep and serious convictions that seem almost impossible to face at the same time…if I forget who God is…God has put me on the floor, staring up at the lights and asking myself, do I really believe what I say I believe?  Do I really want what I think I want?

It's funny when I visualize this…I know very little about boxing, but I know that this combination is one, that if successfully employed, can effectively knock out your opponent in a matter of seconds, before he knows what's hit him.  Technically the combination is “Jab-straight, right-left, hook to the head”.  The initial jab is intended to cause the opponent to block that initial hit, the next hit is meant to hit where it hurts, if you will, and again to create a distraction so that the fighter can then make one last hit, right where it really matters.  

No, I don’t view God as a big ol’ meanie trying to hurt me, but He’s certainly gotten my attention!  

That initial jab was a conviction about debt—later on I’m sure I’ll post more in detail about this because I really, firmly believe that it’s something that is keeping too many of us distracted from what’s really important.  Debt is literally enslaving us to work that, from an eternal perspective, is utterly devoid of value and it is keeping us focused on too much that doesn’t matter, causing us to lose sight of what does.  But believe me when I say that this initial jab went straight to my heart.  I was guilty of conforming far too much to the world and it's ways and I WASN’T looking to God as my provider for the things desired, I was looking to the bank…ouch. 

The “straight right” hit me in the gut.  When my husband’s six years of active duty in the Air Force were over we had some big decisions to make (and we did get to see some AMAZING provision through this time!).  One thing that I knew, because God had given me a fairly clear vision of what our family was supposed to look like and how we were supposed to live, was that my husband needed to be home as much as possible with me and the three kids that God had given us to raise and disciple.  I’ll write a TON about that later, I’m sure  :)  At the bottom of it, It was clear to me that daddy being home as much as possible to train his kiddos was far more important than money and possessions.  

But then life happened.  

We built a house, jobs were scarce here in rural WI, there were bills to pay, and all those ducks seemed far too out of place!  Sure we prayed about it, we asked God for a job, for guidance and direction…but we were also feeling a touch impatient.  So when a job came up on Base (in the cities, two hours away) that promised a very large income and opportunity for earning rank quickly, it was easy to say, “Surely this is from God!” even though we knew that an extra four hours of driving each day and too early mornings and ridiculous bed times, with little left for family was NOT part of the vision God had given us.  But isn’t Satan always there, ready with a counterfeit that looks sooooo good in a moment of fear and doubt?  Heck!  Slavery in Egypt was looking good compared to the giants in the Land flowing with milk and honey, whose grape clusters were too large for one man to carry…

Long story short, after three years of living that way, tons of stress, feeling unfulfilled and knowing that we weren’t following God’s plan for us, God hit us with that straight right and it doubled us over.  Not only had we become accustomed to living in a particular socioeconomic bracket, we had also seen the ‘blessing’ of money as an open door for more things (i.e. more debt).   I am not talking about credit cards, God had given us enough sense to stay away from those; but in pursuit of the vision we had of our future (which God has given us), to include a self-sustainable farm, we used worldly means to acquire land, tractors, etc.  Of course, we never had time to use or enjoy any of it while hubz was working so hard to pay for it all…hmmmmm…doesn’t sound like the “Promised Land” to me.  

Because we truly do desire to be obedient and more than anything we WANT God’s way, His plan, His purposes for us, we were very quick to pray for forgiveness, guidance, and direction.  And He was faithful to give it.  My husband was led to resign from his position and begin his own business(es).  But I confess, while I was responsible for putting a fire under him, praying for God to unwrap his fingers from anything keeping him there—much to Mitch’s dismay—when it came down to it, I was a little nervous!  I had developed our budget and was well aware of what we needed to pay bills and survive…and it just was not possible to live without his income.  When I say “not possible” I mean it…

Day after day I would randomly open my bible to passages that hit the proverbial nail on the head, pounding it deeper into my soul.  Luke 12:13-34 (paralleled in Matt. 6) was one that slapped me right in the face.  I know, slapping is not part of the 1-2-3 combination, but still…
The passage starts like this:

Then one from the crowd said to Him [Jesus], 

“Teacher, tell my brother to divide the inheritance with me.”

But He said to him, “Man, who made Me a judge or an arbitrator over you?” And He said to them, “Take heed and beware of covetousness, for one’s life does not consist in the abundance of the things he possesses.” 

Then He spoke a parable to them, saying: “The ground of a certain rich man yielded plentifully.  And he thought within himself, saying, ‘What shall I do, since I have no room to store my crops?’  So he said, ‘I will do this: I will pull down my barns and build greater, and there I will store all my crops and my goods.  And I will say to my soul, “Soul, you have many goods laid up for many years; take your ease; eat, drink, and be merry.”’   
But God said to him, ‘Fool! This night your soul will be required of you; then whose will those things be which you have provided?’
  
“So is he who lays up treasure for himself, and is not rich toward God.”

Man, that guy totally missed the boat!  And I don’t want to…I had to face myself in this mirror, as ugly as it looked.  What treasure was I, were we, laying up for ourselves?  What was it my kids were learning about priorities in life?  Were we showing them how important eternal investments are?
The passage continues…

Then He said to His disciples, “Therefore I say to you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat; nor about the body, what you will put on.  Life is more than food, and the body is more than clothing.  Consider the ravens, for they neither sow nor reap, which have neither storehouse nor barn; and God feeds them. Of how much more value are you than the birds?  And which of you by worrying can add one cubit to his stature?

If you then are not able to do the least, why are you anxious for the rest? Consider the lilies, how they grow: they neither toil nor spin; and yet I say to you, even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these.   If then God so clothes the grass, which today is in the field and tomorrow is thrown into the oven, how much more will He clothe you, O you of little faith?  OH YOU OF LITTLE FAITH, JEN. 

“And do not seek what you should eat or what you should drink, nor have an anxious mind.  

 For all these things the nations of the world seek after, and your Father knows that you need these things.
  
But seek ye FIRST the kingdom of God, and all these things shall be added to you.

“Do not fear, little flock, for it is your Father’s good pleasure to give you the kingdom.  Sell what you have and give alms; provide yourselves money bags which do not grow old, a treasure in the heavens that does not fail, where no thief approaches nor moth destroys.  For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.

Oy vey...

Is there a better picture in scripture of God as our Provider than this?  

I almost heard Him saying to me, ‘Don’t worry about and spin your wheels trying to meet these practical needs, Jen.  I know what you need and I will give it all to you and more.  Trust me.  TRUST ME.  Don’t be afraid of the giants, Jen, don’t fear for your children’s lives when I’m the One who holds them, don’t wish for leeks and garlic that cost your freedom, inherit the land that’s prepared for you!  Don’t you know that there’s more to life than these things?  I have more in store for you and your family than this…Follow me.  Follow me.  I’m going to show you treasures that will last forever, I’m going to show you how to invest your time and money in things that you’ll enjoy for eternity.”

And He is.   

That left hook to the face came when I recognized that I was failing to store up heavenly treasures by obeying His call to really love my neighbors.  These were the passages that knocked me out cold.  

Deuteronomy 15, the first six verses talk about debt and how God wanted His people to handle it.  READ IT.  Let it speak to you.  Then verses 7-11 say this:

“If there is among you a poor man of your brethren, within any of the gates in your land which the Lord your God is giving you, you shall not harden your heart nor shut your hand from your poor brother, but you shall open your hand wide to him and willingly lend him sufficient for his need, whatever he needs. Beware lest there be a wicked thought in your heart, saying, ‘The seventh year, the year of release, is at hand,’ and your eye be evil against your poor brother and you give him nothing, and he cry out to the Lord against you, and it become sin among you.  You shall surely give to him, and your heart should not be grieved when you give to him, because for this thing the Lord your God will bless you in all your works and in all to which you put your hand.  For the poor will never cease from the land; therefore I command you, saying, ‘You shall open your hand wide to your brother, to your poor and your needy, in your land.’

Here’s another:

Isaiah 58 (the entirety is worth reading, so do!) but these are the verse that applies here is v. 7:

Is this not the fast that I have chosen? that you share your bread with the hungry, And that you bring to your house the poor who are cast out; When you see the naked, that you cover him…

And yet another, Matthew 25:31-46

“When the Son of Man comes in His glory, and all the holy angels with Him, then He will sit on the throne of His glory. All the nations will be gathered before Him, and He will separate them one from another, as a shepherd divides his sheep from the goats.  And He will set the sheep on His right hand, but the goats on the left.

Then the King will say to those on His right hand, ‘Come, you blessed of My Father, inherit the kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world:⁵ for I was hungry and you gave Me food; I was thirsty and you gave Me drink; I was a stranger and you took Me in; ³⁶ I was naked and you clothed Me; I was sick and you visited Me; I was in prison and you came to Me.’
“Then the righteous will answer Him, saying, ‘Lord, when did we see You hungry and feed You, or thirsty and give You drink?  When did we see You a stranger and take You in, or naked and clothe You? Or when did we see You sick, or in prison, and come to You?’ And the King will answer and say to them, ‘Assuredly, I say to you, inasmuch as you did it to one of the least of these My brethren, you did it to Me.’

“Then He will also say to those on the left hand, ‘Depart from Me, you cursed, into the everlasting fire prepared for the devil and his angels: for I was hungry and you gave Me no food; I was thirsty and you gave Me no drink; I was a stranger and you did not take Me in, naked and you did not clothe Me, sick and in prison and you did not visit Me.’
“Then they also will answer Him, saying, ‘Lord, when did we see You hungry or thirsty or a stranger or naked or sick or in prison, and did not minister to You?’  Then He will answer them, saying, ‘Assuredly, I say to you, inasmuch as you did not do it to one of the least of these, you did not do it to Me.’  And these will go away into everlasting punishment, but the righteous into eternal life.”

The story of the good Samaritan was another that deeply spoke to my failings…he used what God had already provided him with, he used the things he needed for his trip, to care for a stranger.  Sigh.  

After all of this, my heart said,

 “So, God, you’re telling me that we should not owe any man anything, that we should wait on you to miraculously provide things that this world says requires DEBT…
You’re telling me not to worry about our practical needs because you’ve got it under control, you’re telling me to trust you even though the numbers in our budget to not add up…
And you’re telling me NOW to open my hand wide unto the poor, to share our bread with the needy, to clothe the naked, and provide shelter for the homeless? You’re telling me this NOW?!?”   

Can you see why I say it was like a 1-2-3 knockout move?  

Yes, I found myself on my back for a time…seeing stars…sweating…But God had gotten my attention.  Do I really trust His word?  That He is, indeed Jehova Jireh.  Do I really believe that His plan is GOOD?  Do I really believe that even though it doesn’t look like anything that seems logical to me, HIS WAY IS BEST?  Do I love Him enough?  Am I conformed to Him enough to pour myself out for the needy?  Am I still willing to obey and give when I’m not sure where our bread will come from?

It’s been over six months since I picked myself up off the mat and chose to step out in faith and follow Jehovah Jireh.  Let me tell you that He has been testing me the whole way!  It’s a little bit funny how He waits until the last minute to come through sometimes, like He’s watching me start to sweat, tremble, take some slow, deep breaths and pray again and again the words, “Yes I trust you”.  Then BAM, He comes through and reminds me that He can move mountains and part seas, of course He can do this small thing.  

What I’m aware of now is that I’m living through one of the most fascinating miracles in the OT (in my opinion...maybe because I so love food!), when Elijah went to the house of a poor widow who had nothing but a bit of flour and oil, which she generously sacrificed to feed God’s servant…and it never ran out.  Ever.  That little bit of flour and oil was always just enough!  I feel like that’s how it’s going for us right now, and while many people may think that it’s a shame to live like that, I am thrilled.  There is an excitement like no other to see God provide daily, to wait on Him, to know that He’s faithful because He actually HAS BEEN and not just because you’re hoping that His words are true…

…And more than that, to experience the joy and blessings of going where He wants us to go.  To see what He’s doing in my husband’s life and heart, to see how our family is growing and changing, even in such a small time, to reap the benefits of it as a wife and mother who had been trying for too long without really accepting God’s provision, His way.   Let me testify to you that it is worth it! God really is Jehovah Jireh and He can really be trusted with everything.