This morning I felt compelled to write here. I'm really not sure why, at this point, the need would arise--but I have learned to follow such leadings, despite my hesitations.
It has been a long while since I have posted here, and longer yet since I've consistently done so. And to be honest, I thought it likely that I may never write here again--that I may never have reason to.
Joyful DORK
A blog about being a living sacrifice. About a life of surrender. About the JOY that surrendering can bring when you follow God's leading in to a life you wouldn't have imagined for yourself.
Well...
The joy has evaporated in the fire that has burned down the life that God called me into. My faith-legs were broken when the rug God called me onto was pulled out from beneath me, and at this moment I am too crippled to move--let alone forward.
I've been trying to hang on.
I've been trying to wrestle, and to fight the battle I find myself in, but I am exhausted in both body and spirit. Broken, it seems, irreparably.
The idea of surrender now evokes a feeling of necessary acceptance of becoming a prisoner of war, rather than the enthusiastic anticipation of stepping forward into some unknown place of beauty.
My mind just won't wrap around the concept that God would lead me into a battle that wouldn't be won. Not when the God I know and trust is fully capable of winning it. Is it that my mind is too firm with stubborn expectations I shouldn't have of God? Is my mind impliable because I'm ungrateful for the promises that have been kept? Forgetful of the gifts that were given, now taken back...
The Lord giveth, and the Lord taketh away.
And I wish I was okay with that.
I just needed a second to simply be.
In that time I've been writing a new blog in which to share my new journey of fighting for the faith to say, and mean, "It is well". And while I may no longer be the same joyful dork I was three years ago, I am still a daughter of the risen King. My faith in that has not been destroyed.
I suppose there is a different kind of joy in knowing that.
Thursday, February 13, 2020
Thursday, July 11, 2019
“For the eyes of Jehovah run to and fro throughout the whole earth, to show himself strong in the behalf of them whose heart is perfect toward him...” (2 Chronicles 16:9)
The context of this verse is a reprimand of a King of Judah, who had until this point trusted in Jehovah and sought Him for help in every trouble that faced his kingdom. Just this once the King turned to another Ruler for help, rather than seeking God first. The King likely thought that it made perfect political sense to ask for an alliance against an enemy, and I think he probably knew that his purpose would be blessed by God. It seems to me that the attitude he had at this point was one of confidence, not only in the plan he had made but in his own means of accomplishing them.
God’s reaction to this was to say “why didn’t you come to me? Haven’t I always helped you in the past? Haven’t I won many battles for you and given you peace and rest? Now you have done foolishly, and from now on you will face wars.”
There are two things in this verse that provoke a sense of awe in me. One is that God is really seeing us. All of us. He is watching and looking for those who seek Him and know Him, who trust Him according to His character.
I don’t think the phrase “those whose heart is perfect towards Him” means sinless perfection. Because God would never find a single person to show Himself strong on behalf of! I think it means, rather, a person who defers to God FIRST in all matters.
The big things, the little things; the things that confuse and confound us, as well as the things that we understand and have enough “common sense” to figure out on our own. The things that scare and overwhelm us, as well as the things that we may take lightly, or consider to be ‘no big deal’. The times when there seems to be no real solution, as well as the times in which there are many obvious and equally ‘acceptable’ options.
The second thing that strikes me is that there are real and often immediate consequences when we fail to have ‘hearts that are perfect towards God’. When we rely on our own wisdom, or on other fallible people, telling God “I don’t really need you for this...” we will lack the peace and rest that He desires for us to have, and instead find ourselves in a constant state of “war” and unrest—spiritually, emotionally, and maybe even within our relationships with others.
But seriously. The eyes of Jehovah run to and fro throughout the whole earth, seeing us, and He wants to show Himself strong for us! That’s pretty incredible, don’t ya think?
Friday, August 12, 2016
A Beautiful Mess
How awesome is it when God speaks directly to your child for the first time?
When, for the first time, they experience Him.
When they feel His comfort so undeniably, and when it is most needed.
My nine year old daughter recently came to me with a confession...Something had happened, and she had behaved in a way that caused her to feel guilty and ashamed. She managed to hide it for a while, even though we are very close and tend to be very open and honest with each other.
She felt afraid of how I would react. She felt afraid that people wouldn't like her if they knew the truth. She was a mess.
It came about that this conversation began the night before with her aunt and uncle. For reasons that I can't share {because it's her story, not mine} they were involved in a situation that led to her secret being known. And after that conversation she had a night to prepare herself before returning home to talk to me. The poor girl suffered in misery that night. She was hurting. She was fearful and anxious.
But, when morning came, a song played on the radio that seemed to come on just for her.
She excitedly shared with me the lyrics she could remember and how it spoke to her heart. How it comforted her. She told me that it made her feel as though God was talking to her through it and "giving her a big hug."
How it made this mother cry! I praised God with her that through her sin God came to her and revealed Himself. Through something that was difficult for her, she had the privilege of experiencing God personally in a way that not everyone does. She felt His presence. His comfort. She had been saved for a while, but I think for the first time that relationship became real.
There have been few moment that have brought me such joy as a mother. This is it. THIS is what I have prayed for my children.
I think it is only right that I share the song. Let it bless you!
"If We're Honest"
When, for the first time, they experience Him.
When they feel His comfort so undeniably, and when it is most needed.
My nine year old daughter recently came to me with a confession...Something had happened, and she had behaved in a way that caused her to feel guilty and ashamed. She managed to hide it for a while, even though we are very close and tend to be very open and honest with each other.
She felt afraid of how I would react. She felt afraid that people wouldn't like her if they knew the truth. She was a mess.
It came about that this conversation began the night before with her aunt and uncle. For reasons that I can't share {because it's her story, not mine} they were involved in a situation that led to her secret being known. And after that conversation she had a night to prepare herself before returning home to talk to me. The poor girl suffered in misery that night. She was hurting. She was fearful and anxious.
But, when morning came, a song played on the radio that seemed to come on just for her.
She excitedly shared with me the lyrics she could remember and how it spoke to her heart. How it comforted her. She told me that it made her feel as though God was talking to her through it and "giving her a big hug."
How it made this mother cry! I praised God with her that through her sin God came to her and revealed Himself. Through something that was difficult for her, she had the privilege of experiencing God personally in a way that not everyone does. She felt His presence. His comfort. She had been saved for a while, but I think for the first time that relationship became real.
There have been few moment that have brought me such joy as a mother. This is it. THIS is what I have prayed for my children.
I think it is only right that I share the song. Let it bless you!
"If We're Honest"
Thursday, May 5, 2016
Where Am I?
Lately I have been yearning for some time to just sit and write.
There are so many things on my heart, and so much flooding this mind of mine; but time is such a precious and fleeting commodity around here. Time for cooking and cleaning, teaching and reprimanding, time for listening and snuggling--but no time for me.
I am mommy. I am wifey. But sometimes I wonder where I am. The woman with the passion to create, to transform, to build, to write! The woman who is driven. For my own sanity, I need to start chiseling out a little bit more time and space for some self expression.
Have I ever mentioned the poetry that I used to write in my youth, or my goal of finishing at least one of the novels that have sat unfinished on my computer for years? hundreds of pages just sitting there in electronic folders, catching, well, something; maybe the goal of writing many more of the stories that live inside of this brain? Or have I told you about the projects and plans that I have to build, to restore--dreams, envisioned, to see?
No? Well it's about time then. Because there is so much about this dork that isn't yet known.
With the investment of a new laptop, I herby purpose to share more of me. And also, to give myself just a little room to be, well, me.
Don't get me wrong. I love my role as wife and mother. I would sacrifice anything for it! But I was myself first. I want my kids to know her. And I want my husband to always remember her.
There are so many things on my heart, and so much flooding this mind of mine; but time is such a precious and fleeting commodity around here. Time for cooking and cleaning, teaching and reprimanding, time for listening and snuggling--but no time for me.
I am mommy. I am wifey. But sometimes I wonder where I am. The woman with the passion to create, to transform, to build, to write! The woman who is driven. For my own sanity, I need to start chiseling out a little bit more time and space for some self expression.
Have I ever mentioned the poetry that I used to write in my youth, or my goal of finishing at least one of the novels that have sat unfinished on my computer for years? hundreds of pages just sitting there in electronic folders, catching, well, something; maybe the goal of writing many more of the stories that live inside of this brain? Or have I told you about the projects and plans that I have to build, to restore--dreams, envisioned, to see?
No? Well it's about time then. Because there is so much about this dork that isn't yet known.
With the investment of a new laptop, I herby purpose to share more of me. And also, to give myself just a little room to be, well, me.
Don't get me wrong. I love my role as wife and mother. I would sacrifice anything for it! But I was myself first. I want my kids to know her. And I want my husband to always remember her.
Friday, February 12, 2016
One Step at a Time
I love how answering my kids questions about spiritual truths so often speaks directly to my own needs. Really, it happens so often and never ceases to amaze me.
Lately I have found myself in a very difficult position. On top of battling hormonal and cyclical symptoms of depression--and the guilt and struggles that accompany it when you actually have to get out of bed and exist--I have been overwhelmed by an onslaught of emotions regarding our current situation in life.
The bible says, " Hope deferred maketh the heart sick." And well. That just about sums it up.
To frame up a very long and complicated background, let me briefly provide some context.
From early on in our marriage, we have had a vision of what our future would look like. While it was nothing like what either of us has planned on our own, we have been confident that these new desires and dreams were God-given. The goals, the plans to achieve them, all seemed promises God had made to us. In my mind our future awaited us like the "Promised Land", and along the way we have tried to do our best to trust God and His provision, to walk in a way that honors Him (though many times we both have failed) as we wander towards what await us.
Well, what we thought would take a couple years, has now taken eight. My little ones are now big ones, and more little ones are added fairly regularly. Where we are currently has gotten to feel something like a "layover" in life. The plan is just not moving forward. We seem to be stranded. Life is going by at an alarming rate and accomplishments and goals that (in my mind) should have been achieved, aren't even in sight.
I have grown impatient to say the least. From the mundane details of daily, practical living, to the deeper spiritual progression that I've anticipated, it seems that everything serves as a reminder that we aren't where we belong. Every detail hangs in this precarious state of "if and when", "when this then that".
With impatience, questions and doubts have also moved in. I've begun to wonder if our plans were way off base. If so, why did we feel "led" down this path? What is the purpose of this not-so-little 'layover'? Especially when everything that will happen "when and if" is ultimately more God honoring than what we are doing now. (Specifically in relating to debt and the money we will have to give and serve when we aren't paying a mortgage!)
There have been so many unexpected twists and turns on this journey so far. Jobs have come and jobs have gone. Finances have been plentiful and time limited until an about face occurs and we are thrust back into uncertainty with plenty of time and more wittingly dependent on God's provision than ever before.
To say that life has been a roller coaster is an understatement. It hasn't been much fun. But on it we have learned to trust God completely. We have learned that He is more than faithful. More than able and ever willing.
Over all life has been filled with much joy and many blessings. When I am fully invested in TODAY, in each individual moment, I feel blessed and satisfied beyond measure. My children and this life I lead, the opportunities that God has provided for me to serve, the rare opportunities I have to use my gifts and fulfill that desire to be 'productive' all make life so wonderful.
...but then the arrows start raining down on me. I wipe the table that my family has officially outgrown for the third time that day and fume because I won't be able to have the big table I've designed, that we are more than capable of making ourselves inexpensively, until we sell this small home and build the "big house".
I step onto the front porch to scream and thrown things at our goats who, inspite of having 10 acres to browse, insist on eating my shrubs that have taken eight years to mature to beautiful health. All because we don't want to sink more money into proper fencing for them until we are at the other property.
I have been slowly becoming a master of 'doing without' things I think I need, and many luxuries we Americans are spoiled with, because we lack the space. Prioritizing and minimizing materialistic items has been a daily effort in our itty bitty home, in order to maintain some semblance of sanity.
Yet while I am truly grateful for the beautiful house that God has given us, the experience we had in the building of it, the warmth and protection it provides, etc., our property we plan to settle on sits and waits. Money is flying from our pockets and is lining those of bankers, while my heart longs to double or triple our giving. When we sell this home we long ago outgrew we will have the means to build the home and farm we have been planning without the help of a bank. All that money that would be paid in interest will finally go where it belongs: to those in need, to furthering the Gospel, towards funding the adventures in serving God together that we dream of as a family.
Our time, such a precious commodity, will be used to build up this family, this home, our church and community, instead of being spent working merely to pay the bills.
These goals are all good, right? They're all based on directives we have found in God's word that we yearn to obey. But none can be accomplished until God moves us to that place, that time. We are dependent on Him for the sale of our house. We trust His timing (at least 80% of the time!), we trust Him to lead us down this path we are on. If He wants us to build on the land, He will provide the means and opportunity.
Despite not being where we hope to be, we have obeyed all of these to the best of our ability, where we are, with the resources we have. We have given when it hurt, we have tried to take advantage of the little time we do have to serve Him. We have devoted our lives to raising the kids God gives us with the lifestyle and ethics we hoped to instill by raising them on the farm. All of these things are good. Should be good enough, right? I just can't accept that it is, and waiting for what is to come has been getting to me.
In the last couple years I have come to understand that there is something more He wants for me before He moves us forward, and it is the most difficult thing of all. It is so difficult because it involves so much discomfort. It's not as easy as acting out of the love God has already placed within our hearts. Instead it requires the death of such an integral part of who we are as people.
He wants me to learn to be content. Truly content. Not merely putting on contentment like a robe that covers my impatience and frustration. He wants me to delight in Him. Not in His blessings, not in the act of serving Him (which IS delightful), not in the act of giving, or even obeying.
He wants me to learn how to take the frustrations of life with grace and faithfulness. He wants me to allow that innate selfishness and entitlement within my heart to whither and die under the strain of those circumstances which are out of my control. He wants my heart set on things above, not on things below.
Yes, I understand this intellectually. Yes, I want to be molded. But it hurts. "Hope deferred" makes me want to forsake the dreams and goals that I have, even though I'm confident that it is a promise from God. Like the Isrealites at the border of the promised land, weary from the desert journey, I want to say "forget this! Let's go back to Egypt cause at least there we didn't expect anything better. At least there we had nothing to fight for." The fight against my own sin nature in this place has made me battle weary.
The fight to trust in God's timing, and the questioning of our past choices has become more intense as of late. I've felt more defeated than ever before.
But then late last night my eight year old daughter sat down to snuggle and began asking me questions that had been troubling her. In tears, she explained to me that she didn't know what she was supposed to do when grows up. She has many desires, many ideas, but she wants more than anything to do what God wants her to do; and like so many of us she wanted to know how on earth she would know what exactly that is.
In talking to her, as so often happens, I felt the Holy Spirit speaking through me not only to her, but to me as well.
Out of my mouth came words depicting life as a maze. Just like a maze, we don't have the ability to see around each turn, to know which way will get us through, let alone what lies ahead at the end. God doesn't give us a map to follow, but He does offer directions for how we are to walk along the way. Each moment we have what we need, the knowledge and directions to walk well along the path. When we come to a place where we have to make a choice, when the way we should go becomes optional, then it's up for us to ask God for wisdom as His word says "if any lacks wisdom let Him ask it of God who gives liberally to all those who ask." It's up to us to be quiet and listen for the answer, then to lay down our own desires, our own thoughts and understanding, our worries and fears, and just trust Him.
Sometimes the right path doesn't seem like the right choice. Sometimes it is incredibly scary. Sometimes the path is riddled with events and circumstances that cause us to question not only why we are on it, but the goodness of the One who directed us to it...
But at the end of the maze, when we can finally see, recalling the journey that is now over, we will understand. And we will be glad and rejoice that we followed Him.
So today I am thankful. I'm thankful that God knows right where I am in this maze of life. He knows where the next turn will lead, He knows when it's coming. He knows where I will end up.
Today I am going to accept that this particular path is a long one, but a good one. Today I'm not going to allow myself to keep stumbling over those stepping stones that are meant to build my strength and character. Today I won't, as tempting as it has been, sit down in the middle of the path and refuse to go on like a frustrated toddler.
Today I will continue on trusting my Father.
Then I'll do the same tomorrow.
Lately I have found myself in a very difficult position. On top of battling hormonal and cyclical symptoms of depression--and the guilt and struggles that accompany it when you actually have to get out of bed and exist--I have been overwhelmed by an onslaught of emotions regarding our current situation in life.
The bible says, " Hope deferred maketh the heart sick." And well. That just about sums it up.
To frame up a very long and complicated background, let me briefly provide some context.
From early on in our marriage, we have had a vision of what our future would look like. While it was nothing like what either of us has planned on our own, we have been confident that these new desires and dreams were God-given. The goals, the plans to achieve them, all seemed promises God had made to us. In my mind our future awaited us like the "Promised Land", and along the way we have tried to do our best to trust God and His provision, to walk in a way that honors Him (though many times we both have failed) as we wander towards what await us.
Well, what we thought would take a couple years, has now taken eight. My little ones are now big ones, and more little ones are added fairly regularly. Where we are currently has gotten to feel something like a "layover" in life. The plan is just not moving forward. We seem to be stranded. Life is going by at an alarming rate and accomplishments and goals that (in my mind) should have been achieved, aren't even in sight.
I have grown impatient to say the least. From the mundane details of daily, practical living, to the deeper spiritual progression that I've anticipated, it seems that everything serves as a reminder that we aren't where we belong. Every detail hangs in this precarious state of "if and when", "when this then that".
With impatience, questions and doubts have also moved in. I've begun to wonder if our plans were way off base. If so, why did we feel "led" down this path? What is the purpose of this not-so-little 'layover'? Especially when everything that will happen "when and if" is ultimately more God honoring than what we are doing now. (Specifically in relating to debt and the money we will have to give and serve when we aren't paying a mortgage!)
There have been so many unexpected twists and turns on this journey so far. Jobs have come and jobs have gone. Finances have been plentiful and time limited until an about face occurs and we are thrust back into uncertainty with plenty of time and more wittingly dependent on God's provision than ever before.
To say that life has been a roller coaster is an understatement. It hasn't been much fun. But on it we have learned to trust God completely. We have learned that He is more than faithful. More than able and ever willing.
Over all life has been filled with much joy and many blessings. When I am fully invested in TODAY, in each individual moment, I feel blessed and satisfied beyond measure. My children and this life I lead, the opportunities that God has provided for me to serve, the rare opportunities I have to use my gifts and fulfill that desire to be 'productive' all make life so wonderful.
...but then the arrows start raining down on me. I wipe the table that my family has officially outgrown for the third time that day and fume because I won't be able to have the big table I've designed, that we are more than capable of making ourselves inexpensively, until we sell this small home and build the "big house".
I step onto the front porch to scream and thrown things at our goats who, inspite of having 10 acres to browse, insist on eating my shrubs that have taken eight years to mature to beautiful health. All because we don't want to sink more money into proper fencing for them until we are at the other property.
I have been slowly becoming a master of 'doing without' things I think I need, and many luxuries we Americans are spoiled with, because we lack the space. Prioritizing and minimizing materialistic items has been a daily effort in our itty bitty home, in order to maintain some semblance of sanity.
Yet while I am truly grateful for the beautiful house that God has given us, the experience we had in the building of it, the warmth and protection it provides, etc., our property we plan to settle on sits and waits. Money is flying from our pockets and is lining those of bankers, while my heart longs to double or triple our giving. When we sell this home we long ago outgrew we will have the means to build the home and farm we have been planning without the help of a bank. All that money that would be paid in interest will finally go where it belongs: to those in need, to furthering the Gospel, towards funding the adventures in serving God together that we dream of as a family.
Our time, such a precious commodity, will be used to build up this family, this home, our church and community, instead of being spent working merely to pay the bills.
These goals are all good, right? They're all based on directives we have found in God's word that we yearn to obey. But none can be accomplished until God moves us to that place, that time. We are dependent on Him for the sale of our house. We trust His timing (at least 80% of the time!), we trust Him to lead us down this path we are on. If He wants us to build on the land, He will provide the means and opportunity.
Despite not being where we hope to be, we have obeyed all of these to the best of our ability, where we are, with the resources we have. We have given when it hurt, we have tried to take advantage of the little time we do have to serve Him. We have devoted our lives to raising the kids God gives us with the lifestyle and ethics we hoped to instill by raising them on the farm. All of these things are good. Should be good enough, right? I just can't accept that it is, and waiting for what is to come has been getting to me.
In the last couple years I have come to understand that there is something more He wants for me before He moves us forward, and it is the most difficult thing of all. It is so difficult because it involves so much discomfort. It's not as easy as acting out of the love God has already placed within our hearts. Instead it requires the death of such an integral part of who we are as people.
He wants me to learn to be content. Truly content. Not merely putting on contentment like a robe that covers my impatience and frustration. He wants me to delight in Him. Not in His blessings, not in the act of serving Him (which IS delightful), not in the act of giving, or even obeying.
He wants me to learn how to take the frustrations of life with grace and faithfulness. He wants me to allow that innate selfishness and entitlement within my heart to whither and die under the strain of those circumstances which are out of my control. He wants my heart set on things above, not on things below.
Yes, I understand this intellectually. Yes, I want to be molded. But it hurts. "Hope deferred" makes me want to forsake the dreams and goals that I have, even though I'm confident that it is a promise from God. Like the Isrealites at the border of the promised land, weary from the desert journey, I want to say "forget this! Let's go back to Egypt cause at least there we didn't expect anything better. At least there we had nothing to fight for." The fight against my own sin nature in this place has made me battle weary.
The fight to trust in God's timing, and the questioning of our past choices has become more intense as of late. I've felt more defeated than ever before.
But then late last night my eight year old daughter sat down to snuggle and began asking me questions that had been troubling her. In tears, she explained to me that she didn't know what she was supposed to do when grows up. She has many desires, many ideas, but she wants more than anything to do what God wants her to do; and like so many of us she wanted to know how on earth she would know what exactly that is.
In talking to her, as so often happens, I felt the Holy Spirit speaking through me not only to her, but to me as well.
Out of my mouth came words depicting life as a maze. Just like a maze, we don't have the ability to see around each turn, to know which way will get us through, let alone what lies ahead at the end. God doesn't give us a map to follow, but He does offer directions for how we are to walk along the way. Each moment we have what we need, the knowledge and directions to walk well along the path. When we come to a place where we have to make a choice, when the way we should go becomes optional, then it's up for us to ask God for wisdom as His word says "if any lacks wisdom let Him ask it of God who gives liberally to all those who ask." It's up to us to be quiet and listen for the answer, then to lay down our own desires, our own thoughts and understanding, our worries and fears, and just trust Him.
Sometimes the right path doesn't seem like the right choice. Sometimes it is incredibly scary. Sometimes the path is riddled with events and circumstances that cause us to question not only why we are on it, but the goodness of the One who directed us to it...
But at the end of the maze, when we can finally see, recalling the journey that is now over, we will understand. And we will be glad and rejoice that we followed Him.
So today I am thankful. I'm thankful that God knows right where I am in this maze of life. He knows where the next turn will lead, He knows when it's coming. He knows where I will end up.
Today I am going to accept that this particular path is a long one, but a good one. Today I'm not going to allow myself to keep stumbling over those stepping stones that are meant to build my strength and character. Today I won't, as tempting as it has been, sit down in the middle of the path and refuse to go on like a frustrated toddler.
Today I will continue on trusting my Father.
Then I'll do the same tomorrow.
Friday, September 18, 2015
A Culture of Sacrifice
I came across a culture in my studies once that deeply disturbed me.
As in ancient days, and the worship of Baal, this culture and its people worshiped a god called Fles. Fles taught that freedom, riches, and success were the keys to happiness, and anything was permitted in order to gain them.
Despite the freedom given to pursue happiness by any means, If one should find themselves unhappy, poor, or unsuccessful they were encouraged to sacrifice their children to the god Fles. Children were known to have great powers over the life of an individual. The power that a single child held could change a life drastically for the better or for the worse. The god Fles was pleased by nothing more than the offering of a child, who if sacrificed assured a happy and successful life.
Ritual sacrifices were held daily by the hundreds in ceremonies wherein the sacrificial priest, donned in priestly robes, face covered, tore the infant children away from the mother while she lay ceremoniously beneath the priest on a cold table, surrounded by unfamiliar instruments of sacrifice. The infant, unlike those sacrificed to the god Baal, were not burned alive in a golden ox as the parents sang and danced in the valley below. Instead, the parents brought offerings of money to the sanctuary for the privilege of sacrificing their babies to the god Fles. Their offerings bought a quiet, gruesome sacrifice of torn limbs and shredded bodies. There was no dancing, no singing.
Other worshipers in this culture were known to bring offerings to the sanctuaries in exchange for the bodies of sacrificed babies. Some used the bodies to create life saving potions, some for salves thought to beautify, others were studied; other times the bodies were simply burned unceremoniously outside of the temple.
It was thought in this culture that to sacrifice children was a great privilege and right. And many offered up their babies to the god Fles to find, or to sustain happiness and success.
Those who did not serve the god Fles were aghast as those around them praised and worshiped and danced around the mothers who came to sacrifice their children on the alter of Fles. They plead with the women, with those shouting supporters, only to be faced with fierce anger and hatred. Many even begged the women for their babies, to save them from the death that awaited them. Yet still, they were met with hatred.
Because Fles was not satisfied merely with the sacrifice of a child. Simply giving up a child would never satiate the appetite of Fles.
Only death.
And the mad voice of those worshipers of Fles continue to cry "freedom".
As in ancient days, and the worship of Baal, this culture and its people worshiped a god called Fles. Fles taught that freedom, riches, and success were the keys to happiness, and anything was permitted in order to gain them.
Despite the freedom given to pursue happiness by any means, If one should find themselves unhappy, poor, or unsuccessful they were encouraged to sacrifice their children to the god Fles. Children were known to have great powers over the life of an individual. The power that a single child held could change a life drastically for the better or for the worse. The god Fles was pleased by nothing more than the offering of a child, who if sacrificed assured a happy and successful life.
Ritual sacrifices were held daily by the hundreds in ceremonies wherein the sacrificial priest, donned in priestly robes, face covered, tore the infant children away from the mother while she lay ceremoniously beneath the priest on a cold table, surrounded by unfamiliar instruments of sacrifice. The infant, unlike those sacrificed to the god Baal, were not burned alive in a golden ox as the parents sang and danced in the valley below. Instead, the parents brought offerings of money to the sanctuary for the privilege of sacrificing their babies to the god Fles. Their offerings bought a quiet, gruesome sacrifice of torn limbs and shredded bodies. There was no dancing, no singing.
Other worshipers in this culture were known to bring offerings to the sanctuaries in exchange for the bodies of sacrificed babies. Some used the bodies to create life saving potions, some for salves thought to beautify, others were studied; other times the bodies were simply burned unceremoniously outside of the temple.
It was thought in this culture that to sacrifice children was a great privilege and right. And many offered up their babies to the god Fles to find, or to sustain happiness and success.
Those who did not serve the god Fles were aghast as those around them praised and worshiped and danced around the mothers who came to sacrifice their children on the alter of Fles. They plead with the women, with those shouting supporters, only to be faced with fierce anger and hatred. Many even begged the women for their babies, to save them from the death that awaited them. Yet still, they were met with hatred.
Because Fles was not satisfied merely with the sacrifice of a child. Simply giving up a child would never satiate the appetite of Fles.
Only death.
And the mad voice of those worshipers of Fles continue to cry "freedom".
Tuesday, November 25, 2014
Culture of Complacency
There is something that I've noticed within our churches for years that has irritated me, frustrated me as I sit in my pew on Sunday morning, and fellowship with other believers here and there throughout the days that follow, as I see posts on FB from fellow believers, and witness the living testimony of those around me.
I see people questioning their priorities, their goals, how they're spending their resources of time, energy, and money. People are dissatisfied with where they are, and for good reason.
"Would I?"
What I've noticed is the culture of complacency that we happily abide in as Christians, a culture that is even encouraged from the pulpit and in Christian counseling, both professionally and between friends.
We see this complacency every where we look, but we don't really see it. We don't see it because we are conditioned to believe that the status quo is ok, even good. It's as though the Calvinistic mindset that prevails in Christian culture has morphed into a doctrine that ties the hands and feet, and blinds the eyes, deafening the ears, of believers under the pretense that "You're right where God wants you to be." Whether we are or not.
When we are struggling-- whether in relationships, finances, work, parenting--we are told, "God has you here for a reason. Remember, He's in control." These words are intended to comfort, and comfort they may. It indeed eases tremendously that uncomfortable sense of personal responsibility and unsettling questioning of the possibility that what we are experiencing is the consequence of our own actions and choices.
I see so many families that are struggling. Parents who live to work in order to provide the things they crave for themselves and their children, running on the treadmill they can never seem to escape regardless of how destructive they realize it is; while their children miss out on the most important things in life: their parents' love, guidance, and teaching, and time.
I see Christians in un-fulfilling jobs that they hate, looking across the fence to the 'greener grass' of ministry and missions, wishing that they could somehow make more time in their schedules to serve, or have more money to give...not recognizing that their debts and insatiable appetite for possessions is enslaving them to work that monopolizes all of their time, leaving nothing left for the Kingdom work their hearts desire to do.
These questions prick at peoples' hearts.
But then they hear from the pulpit, or from Christian friends, that "God has you right where He wants you." As though it's not possible for us Christians to make poor choices, or to ever be outside of God's will.
We forget that God is the same today as He was yesterday.
We forget that we serve and follow the same God that planned to bring His people into the promised land. That was His will, His plan for them. But for so many reasons, the people chose not to trust and follow God into the land, and subsequently wandered the wilderness outside of the land for the rest of their lives! God did indeed provide for them and protect them during this time in the wilderness, and yes, they were right where God had them...but they could not be comforted by the notion that 'they were right where God wanted them'. No, sir. They knew that they had failed to step out in faith and follow His leading. They knew they had missed the boat.
We serve and follow the same God that called Jonah to work that he didn't want to do. Work he tried to avoid. Avoidance that landed him the the belly of a whale. Was the whale "right where God wanted" Jonah? Certainly. God wanted Jonah to experience a consequence for his actions! But that wasn't His original intention for Jonah, was it?
We serve and follow the same God that promised us through Jesus that He would provide all of our needs if we only seek first His Kingdom and not our own. The same God who tells us to lay up for ourselves treasures in heaven, not here.
Those who are working hard for menial pay may not ever think that they are seeking a kingdom of their own, or that they are laying up treasures for themselves on earth; but if they are sacrificing the Kingdom work that God has for them in order to meet their own financial needs, they are failing to TRUST in His provision!
In my own life, in the life of my family, I DO NOT want to find myself within this culture of complacency. I NEVER want to settle for the status quo, or assume that 'I'm right where He wants me' without question.
I want my eyes to be open to His vision, I want my ears to be open to His words for me, my feet to be ready to move and go where He leads me. Never do I want to stop questioning whether or not I am building my own Kingdom here on earth. Even when what I'm doing seems good and right. Even when the choices that I'm making seem "righteous" and biblical...
I MUST always remember to trust in God's provision instead of putting that responsibility on myself and neglecting to follow Him, seeking instead comfort, safety, security, or all the things this world has to offer.
God has not called only those in remote mission fields to forsake everything to serve Him.
While He may want us to remain here in comfortable western civilization to serve Him in our homes and local communities; while He may want us to serve Him in a business or work setting, He still wants our hearts. For "Where our treasure is, there our hearts will be also."
We should NEVER, EVER stop questioning whether we are where we are for us, or for Him. Whether the choices we have made were made for us, or for Him.
Are we where we think we need to be, or where He's called us? Are we doing what we think we need to do, or what He's clearly called us to do?
Whether we are called to Africa, or to corporate America, we need to test the grasp that we have on our possessions, on life as we know it. Our comfortable homes, our cars, our clothing, the security of our income, our families and the way we raise them...all of it.
Whether or not we've heard God tell us, as He told the rich young Israelite, to sell all we have and give to the poor, we should constantly question
x
We see this complacency every where we look, but we don't really see it. We don't see it because we are conditioned to believe that the status quo is ok, even good. It's as though the Calvinistic mindset that prevails in Christian culture has morphed into a doctrine that ties the hands and feet, and blinds the eyes, deafening the ears, of believers under the pretense that "You're right where God wants you to be." Whether we are or not.
When we are struggling-- whether in relationships, finances, work, parenting--we are told, "God has you here for a reason. Remember, He's in control." These words are intended to comfort, and comfort they may. It indeed eases tremendously that uncomfortable sense of personal responsibility and unsettling questioning of the possibility that what we are experiencing is the consequence of our own actions and choices.
I see so many families that are struggling. Parents who live to work in order to provide the things they crave for themselves and their children, running on the treadmill they can never seem to escape regardless of how destructive they realize it is; while their children miss out on the most important things in life: their parents' love, guidance, and teaching, and time.
I see Christians in un-fulfilling jobs that they hate, looking across the fence to the 'greener grass' of ministry and missions, wishing that they could somehow make more time in their schedules to serve, or have more money to give...not recognizing that their debts and insatiable appetite for possessions is enslaving them to work that monopolizes all of their time, leaving nothing left for the Kingdom work their hearts desire to do.
These questions prick at peoples' hearts.
But then they hear from the pulpit, or from Christian friends, that "God has you right where He wants you." As though it's not possible for us Christians to make poor choices, or to ever be outside of God's will.
We forget that God is the same today as He was yesterday.
We forget that we serve and follow the same God that planned to bring His people into the promised land. That was His will, His plan for them. But for so many reasons, the people chose not to trust and follow God into the land, and subsequently wandered the wilderness outside of the land for the rest of their lives! God did indeed provide for them and protect them during this time in the wilderness, and yes, they were right where God had them...but they could not be comforted by the notion that 'they were right where God wanted them'. No, sir. They knew that they had failed to step out in faith and follow His leading. They knew they had missed the boat.
We serve and follow the same God that called Jonah to work that he didn't want to do. Work he tried to avoid. Avoidance that landed him the the belly of a whale. Was the whale "right where God wanted" Jonah? Certainly. God wanted Jonah to experience a consequence for his actions! But that wasn't His original intention for Jonah, was it?
We serve and follow the same God that promised us through Jesus that He would provide all of our needs if we only seek first His Kingdom and not our own. The same God who tells us to lay up for ourselves treasures in heaven, not here.
Those who are working hard for menial pay may not ever think that they are seeking a kingdom of their own, or that they are laying up treasures for themselves on earth; but if they are sacrificing the Kingdom work that God has for them in order to meet their own financial needs, they are failing to TRUST in His provision!
In my own life, in the life of my family, I DO NOT want to find myself within this culture of complacency. I NEVER want to settle for the status quo, or assume that 'I'm right where He wants me' without question.
I want my eyes to be open to His vision, I want my ears to be open to His words for me, my feet to be ready to move and go where He leads me. Never do I want to stop questioning whether or not I am building my own Kingdom here on earth. Even when what I'm doing seems good and right. Even when the choices that I'm making seem "righteous" and biblical...
I MUST always remember to trust in God's provision instead of putting that responsibility on myself and neglecting to follow Him, seeking instead comfort, safety, security, or all the things this world has to offer.
God has not called only those in remote mission fields to forsake everything to serve Him.
While He may want us to remain here in comfortable western civilization to serve Him in our homes and local communities; while He may want us to serve Him in a business or work setting, He still wants our hearts. For "Where our treasure is, there our hearts will be also."
We should NEVER, EVER stop questioning whether we are where we are for us, or for Him. Whether the choices we have made were made for us, or for Him.
Are we where we think we need to be, or where He's called us? Are we doing what we think we need to do, or what He's clearly called us to do?
Whether we are called to Africa, or to corporate America, we need to test the grasp that we have on our possessions, on life as we know it. Our comfortable homes, our cars, our clothing, the security of our income, our families and the way we raise them...all of it.
Whether or not we've heard God tell us, as He told the rich young Israelite, to sell all we have and give to the poor, we should constantly question
x
I see people questioning their priorities, their goals, how they're spending their resources of time, energy, and money. People are dissatisfied with where they are, and for good reason.
"Would I?"
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