Polished Corner Posts--part 2

As I consider the future of my girls, contemplate what I want for them, what I hope they will accomplish, the gifts that I pray they will develop in order to serve God, and as I begin to see who they are at heart and what their desires are, what they dream of, I can only come to one conclusion.

I don't want any of it for them.

What I mean is that more than any of that, I want God's plans for them.

It is so common for people to direct their children's paths according to their own purposes and dreams, and this might be ok if any of us were perfect at hearing God's voice and obeying it! But let's face it, we're not.  I don't want to even think that I might guide my daughters into a life that diametrically opposes the life God had for them. And, yes, I think that is definitely possible and happens more often than not!

Similarly, my girls' dreams are precious to me.  The things that they would like to "be when they grow up" put a smile on my face, and I hope that they will grow up to be confident in their abilities to do it all if that is God's will...but only if that is God's will!

I know so many women who have gone through school at the top of their classes, succeeded academically, pursued the goal of a career, because this is precisely what the world is telling them they should be doing, only to be married and want to start a family, but feel that they have to sacrifice everything to do it.  Either they sacrifice their career, education, and everyone else's expectations of them to raise their families, or they sacrifice their families and their desires by trying to "do it all", knowing that they can't do any of it as well as they could do one or the other.
Do not get me wrong here, the Proverbs 31 woman did ALOT!  She is what I would call "successful" by any standard.   But she didn't sacrifice her children for a career--she used her God-given gifts and sold her goods in the market. Nor did she refuse to do everything she could to care for a provide for her family.  She worked hard, rose early to make their clothing, acquired land and fields,  generally took care of business!  and her family never suffered.  She never sacrificed.

I have written before on the importance of being yoked to Christ, and not overburdening yourself "putting more on your plate than you could or should possibly eat!".  While there are a great many things we're all capable of doing, especially our daughters, we need to learn ourselves and teach them that it is best to do what's before us.  There is a time and place, a season, for everything.  If there is something for our girls to do, they'll do it in the right time and place!   We need to trust that.
So how does this impact the way I raise my daughters?
In so many ways...

In fact, each facet of raising daughters will hopefully become a post of it's own.  But for now, I'll stick with what is fresh on my heart and mind, as I am still in the process of developing our plans for this years' schooling.


God knows the plans He has for them, I don't.
God knows how He's gifted them already, I have yet to see much of this in my girls.
God also knows how He will provide for them in the future, I can't possibly.
And He knows the very BEST and safest way to equip my girls for their future. There are a lot of options out there for equipping our kiddos for the future via education, extra-curricular activities, etc; but let's face it, not all of them are good!

We will teach them the three Rs ("Readin', Writin', and 'Rithmetic") as it pertains to real life!  Give them plenty of opportunities to grow and mature in their faith, in their own person, in serving others, and we will give them ample freedom to be children, to play, pretend, take risks, get hurt, and all of that wonderful stuff that seems to be taken away from kids left and right nowadays. 
And we will give them freedom to be girls!  They know that they will grow up to be women someday, even if they don't know whether they'll be nurses or doctors, or missionaries   :)  We let them "mother" their baby brother, even their older brother! We let them play with dolls and play house as much as possible.  We let them cook and create, sew, and do all things feminine.  Things that will equipe them to be what there's little doubt they will grow to be.  WOMEN!   Wives and mothers.  Our goal is to equip them to be the best wives and mothers they can possibly be.

We can offer our children peace and freedom.  Build within them a desire for God's truth and direction, and just watch where He takes them as they are willing to follow!

Educating Our Daughters

It is my firm belief that, even as a home school mother, it isn't my job to equip my kids for their unique future.

HUH?

I know, I know...

What I mean is that only God can truly equip them.  And if I start believing that I can do it myself, I guarantee that I will fail to equip them properly!   

There is so little time in life.  So little time in childhood.  Soooo little time in every single day to do the job of preparing our children for life...so we have taken the simple approach.  We have prioritized our goal, defined our vision, and we aim only at that and trust God for the rest!

What this means for our girls is this:

We will do our best to help them be their best!  

More than so much else, I want to provide the quiet that my girls need.  The voices of the world do not penetrate the walls of our home.  They will not hear that they are expected to go to college or pursue a career.  They don't need to be told that eventually they will most likely become wives and mothers, that's pretty obvious to them   ;)   so, we will live out life accordingly.  Encouraging the development of skills and habits that will allow them to be wonderful, and JOYFUL wives and mothers.   Women who will, in fact, be corner posts of their homes, whose husbands will trust them with everything, whose children will always know that they are the first priority, that they are protected, nurtured, and loved.  

From budgeting, to shopping, cooking and cleaning, it is my purpose to raise my girls to be happy, cheerful, capable servants in the home, who have been endowed with wisdom and prudence and confidence in their "job", fully aware of their importance.   

I want them to have a firm grasp on finances and time management, so that they can maintain financial peace and stability regardless of their family's income or circumstance. 

I want them to be in the habit of routinely doing domestic chores so that doing them is second nature and not drudgery (anyone else wish they'd been raised that way?) My mother is this way, always flitting about doing something, usually happily!  In all my years growing up, I never heard her mutter a word about "another load of laundry...", or that if she had to wash another dish today she'd scream...doing these things always made her happy, she was content to serve in her home.

I want for them to grow to be holistic lovers! Able and ready to love in every way possible, from wiping baby bums playfully to being a good lover of their husbands. (you can't learn this in a book)  From being generous helpers to those in need, to lovingly providing the BEST quality food, for their families and others who will have the pleasure of enjoying their home cooking, not just what is convenient, I want my girls to by nature go out of their way to love those around them deeply, and effectively. 

I want for them to grow to be women who are so gorgeous inside that whatever they look like outside will also be beautiful because their spirits radiate from within.  

None of this requires books or desks.  Most requires very little in the way of "lessons".  It requires a lot of time together.  A lot of discipleship.  A whole lot of nurturing and being a good example myself.  What it requires is that we include them in life. 

Schooling for my little women will never look a thing like the education of their peers. 

But...

If God has a plan for them to do something that I can't possibly prepare for, whether it is a career or serving the community in some way that requires more knowledge than we imbue to them, then I KNOW and TRUST that He will give them opportunities and the ability to learn what they need to learn, when they need to learn it. Whether it's physics, calculus, statistics, or any of the other things they could be learning...

We cannot possibly teach them everything they may need to know...public school, private school, charter schools can't either!  but what we can do is prepare them for anything, and we can prepare them to be the best they can be at anything they set their minds to!   

We can sow seeds that will reap a good and plentiful harvest, thoughtfully and purposefully...or we can sow a crap-load of random seeds that the world thrusts in our hands, haphazardly, and hope for the best.